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You Only Need
One (Part One)
 December
is here. Peppermint Mochas replace the hum-drum morning Joe, Christmas
music fills the air, shoppers abound - the holidays have arrived.
And thus begins my season of mail madness. After all, nothing decorates
a single girl's life like a booked social calendar. And
nothing justifies fashionable
retailing like a good holiday party. A girl can't just wear
black to a holiday fête. Au contraire, her attire must be
at least as festive as the holiday candies. Can you imagine a Hershey's
Kiss wrapped in black foil? I think not. Though sadly, unlike her
holiday party attire, the booked social calendar cannot be bought
with a credit card.
Waiting on invites
is like waiting for a report card - only a party-less holiday is
far worse than an A-less report card. (Grades were overrated anyway.
They had an inverse relationship to dates, and I'd have preferred
worse grades and better dates. But that's in the past.) Now we must
grapple with invitations. I think married people don't fret quite
as much as they have double the friend pool from which to receive
invites. We single girls must depend only on our friends to deliver
the invite which begets the dress which begets the party which begets
the mistletoe and FINALLY begets the kiss. Exhausting, really.
So from Thanksgiving
thru the first week of December, I stalk my mail man. I race to
him each day with such anxious anticipation that he now has a pocket
full of Hershey Kisses (for me), as well as his usual pocket full
of dog bones (for Cross). My whole apartment complex must be wrought
with cuckoo women as he doesn't seem that shocked when I dig thru
his bag to insure he hasn't missed anything. In
the meantime, I stock my closet with all sorts of requisite holiday
party attire. Ready to wear: red velvet suit, silver
top to wear with sleek
black pants and red heels, sassy
dress, something
tartan, and of course, very glam
earrings.
That being said,
as of today, December 3, 2004, I have received only ONE holiday
invitation. Worse than that, the attire is CASUAL. (Really, why
even have a party? Am sure hostess twit got horrid grades in school
and dated the quarterback.) AND it is a cover dish supper. What
is this dementia? After conferring with my usual consortium
of analytical minds, I have come to accept the dismal reality that
I will only be receiving one holiday invitation. No one would send
an invitation after this point, as they would know that all socialites
(aside from myself) would be otherwise booked. As such, they recommend
that I make the most of my solo night and see if I can return all
the glamorous party duds already purchased.
So, given that
I only have one chance to shine, I phoned Shop Girl to schedule
a strategy session. She told me to quit my whining and to jot down
my current Party Plan so we'd have a starting point. (She really
is very bossy.)
Party
Plan
- Mistletoe.
Make sure party host has mistletoe
placed in prominent place. Requisite holiday snogs (this is British
for kiss) at risk. Will deliver marvelous Kissing
Ball to hostess day before party and 'help' her hang my ticket
to smooches. Earns self double points as will appear very good
friend and perhaps word will leak out and help future invitations.
- Covered
Dish. Easy. (SG - I really don't need your help here.) Am making
Poinsettia
Cocktails. Will cover punch bowl up real well as directed
so it doesn't leak in the car.
- Outfit.
Green
cords, very
cute tartan mud boots, red
cable knit sweater? Too outdoorsy? Too much like walking,
talking, kissing JCrew catalog? Don't understand CASUAL
attire for holiday parties. Seems like an oxymoron to me. Need
help, here.
- Make-up. Refuse
to be casual with make-up. Can I still wear Body Bling? Regardless,
Bella's
Cinnamon Honey Lip Plumpers are a must. Will be perfect for
making lips perky, plump and trés kissable.
- Undies. Red.
You never know.
We're meeting
later today over Peppermint Mochas. Will let you know details later.
Ho! Ho! Ho!
To be continued...
she she sponsor:
Daisy
Notes + Paper
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 To
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daisy notes
+ paper
5826 Fayetteville Rd. Ste. 105
Durham, NC 27713
919.544.8491
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